Two Outta Four: TOP CHEF LIVE BLOG

1006: Okay, so two of the final four chefs are Asian. Maybe not the two I had anticipated but ... I'll deal.

1007: I'm not sure what it is about being on Top Chef but for some reason, when it gets to four, regardless of the season, the chefs feel compelled to come back with new haircuts.

1010: So the quickfire challenge has our final four cooking ... wait for it ... on ski lifts mountain side gondolas in Whistler. I'm not sure what the ratings have been like this year but these 'extreme' cooking challenges have been way too frequent and nigh unwatchable. Not a fan to say the least. Here's hoping they straighten up their act and get back to actual cooking next season.

1015: It's been 15 minutes and ... Beverly's already annoying while Lindsey screwed the pooch on her dish. Shocker ... ?

1018: Whatever, Lindsey. Enjoy failure in the finale.

1019: A zillion barbeque challenges, countless extreme challenges, free passes to the final two rounds ...  this season has completely confounded me.

1021: Sarah - "Beverly ... is the silent horse." Riiiiiight.

1024: I had a coherent thought two seconds ago ... then the fiance started playing 'Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now' by Starship. Where am I? What's happening?

1025: Food in ice blocks. Keep on pushing it, a**holes. 

1027: Watching the contestants wail away at the ice blocks reminds me of my childhood ... wailing away at ice blocks, working in a hot dog truck in DC. FYI, Asian parents don't understand the phrase 'child labor laws.'

1032:  You have to love the karma. Paul helps his fellow contestants, takes down the second quickfire and the second seat in the finale. Meanwhile, Sarah is already lining up therapists, in the event she screws the pooch against Bev. Love it.

1038: And for the final challenge? A biathlon.  I want jump off my balcony into a cauldron of scalding hot split pea soup.

1045: If nothing else, the look of absolute anguish on Sarah's face throughout this ep has been worth the price of admission.

1049: Judges' table, deliberation time as we go to commercial. Bravo once again shoves 'Watch What Happens Live' down our throats and adds the ghoulish grill of Lil' Kim into the mix for good measure. I will never watch that 'show'. (And I may not sleep tonight.)

1054: More commercials. I'm sure Ellen Degeneres uses a ton of the stuff but I'm not getting her as a L'Oreal pitch person. Old Navy, Toyota Prius? Maybe. Make-up? Not so much. Stick with Sofia Vergara, thanks.

1057: Moment of truth ... and all I can fixate on is Padma's yellow shirt.

1058: Ugh. Sarah moves on and ups the annoying quotient for the finale.

1101: Wait, what? That was just the semifinal round? A one-on-one finale? What in the crikey hell is going on?

1103: Just a quick word to close this post. I know I've said it ad nauseum but this season has really been a dud. Again, totally flying blind on this season's ratings but I do know the past few seasons have seen a dip in viewership so I can understand a few tweaks. That said, the need to keep things interesting  shouldn't come at the expense of the show's integrity. And I'll leave it at that.

Thanks for playing, kids. Good times watching and writing. I say good day.